


Transformation

by BloodRedRidingHood



Series: I'll Be Your Shield [19]
Category: Captain America: The First Avenger - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: F/M, Flashbacks, Kind of fluffy, Steve Remembers, and just sorry, more angst than anything though, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-08
Updated: 2013-10-08
Packaged: 2017-12-28 21:12:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/996761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BloodRedRidingHood/pseuds/BloodRedRidingHood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before the serum, before his transformation, he had feared death.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Transformation

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

The darkness spreading throughout his mind didn't scare him this time. And the cold was a welcome feeling. It was something he remembered. He would even welcome it, if there wasn't one thing holding him back.

\---

_"What's this?"_

_Natasha looked up at Steve, questioning the small velvet box he had given her. They were sitting in their favorite diner, having just returned from S.H.I.E.L.D. HQ. He was still buzzing from their earlier encounter in the bathroom, and from the way that Natasha bit her lip and fidgeting around in her seat, he could tell she was, too. Reaching across the table, he nudged the box towards her a little bit before snatching a french fry off of her plate._

_"Open it," he replied, smiling at her. "I'm not going to say that you're going to love it, because I honestly don't know if you will. But I hope you will."_

_She looked at him skeptically, but opened the box. Her face shifted through several emotions in only a few seconds, but when it settled, she looked up at him with confusion in her green eyes._

_"A key. You gave me a key?"_

_Steve nodded and took a sip of the coffee in front of him. "I've been doing some thinking. After I'm done with this mission, I'm done. I'm retiring. I've been looking at houses outside of the city."_

_"Steve, I--"_

_"No, Natasha, you don't have to answer or say anything. I just want you to know that there is an option." He reached across the table and took her hand in his, running his thumb over the ring he had given her. "I love you. I want to be with you. And, God and yourself willing, marry you and start a family. I want that, and I only want it with you."_

_She looked terrified, and her hand was shaking, but she didn't pull away. They stayed like that for a while, and finally, she smiled at him. She nodded slightly and blinked a few times, then pulled her hand away and stood up._

_"I'll be right back," she said. She leaned down and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you," she whispered, then she walked towards the restroom._

\---

He didn't want to leave her. He'd lost everyone he'd ever loved, and now the woman he loved was going to lose him. Even through the burning pain in his chest and the cold and darkness creeping into his mind, the fear of what would happen to her when he was gone kept him trying to fight. He wanted to scream and kick and fight his way back, but he couldn't move.

There was a howling in his ears, and the fire was gone. The darkness closed in around his mind, the chill had finally settled in his bones. He didn't want to leave her.

Natasha's voice broke through one last time, whispering three words over and over as he finally gave in.

_"I love you."_

He couldn't move, couldn't reach out for her or tell her it was going to be okay. Before the serum, before his transformation, he had feared death. Finally, he gave in to the ice, wishing he could smile for her just one last time.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry...


End file.
